Monday, September 18, 2006

Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0

Dear Tech Support:

Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0. I soon noticed
that the new program began unexpected child processing that took up a lot
of space and valuable resources.

In addition, Wife 1.0 installed itself into all other programs and now
monitors all other system activity. Applications such as Poker Night
10.3, Footb all 5.0 , Hunting and Fishing 7.5 , and Sailing 3.6.

I can't seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while attempting to run
my favorite applications. I'm thinking about going back to Girlfriend
7.0 , but the uninstall doesn't work on Wife 1.0 Please help!

Troubled User.....


Dear Troubled User:

This is a very common problem that men complain about.

Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0, thinking that it
is just a Utilities and Entertainment program. Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING
SYSTEM and is designed by its Creator to run EVERYTHING!!! It is also
impossible to delete Wife 1.0 and to return to Girlfriend 7.0 . It is
impossible to uninstall, or purge the program files from the system once

You cannot go back to Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife 1.0 is designed to
not allow this. Look in your Wife 1.0 manual under Warnings-Mayhem/Alimony/Child
Support . I recommend that you keep Wife 1.0 and work on improving the situation.
I suggest installing the background application "Yes, Dear" to alleviate software augmentation.

The best course of action is to enter the command C:\APOLOGIZE! b ecause
ultimately you will have to give the APOLOGIZE command before the system
will return to normal anyway.

Wife 1.0 is a great program, but it tends to be very high maintenance .
Wife 1.0 comes with several support programs, such as Clean and Sweep
3.0 , Cook It 1.5, Do Bills 4.2, and Shop 8.2 .

However, be very careful how you use these programs. Improper use will
cause the system to launch the program Nag Nag 9.5 . Once this happens,
the only way to improve the performance of Wife 1.0 is to purchase
additional software. I recommend Flowers 2.1 and Diamonds 5.0 !

WARNING!!! DO NOT, under any circumstances, install Secretary With
Short Skirt 3.3 . This application is not supported by Wife 1.0 and will
cause irreversible damage to the operating system!

Best of luck,

Tech Support

1 comment:

1crazyoldlady said...

I have been that upgrade since before computers and I never thought I would stumble into anything that would make me laugh more than him[iluv him ]you all keep it up I'll be watching and still laughing I also have advice on what to do with previous girlfriend7.0 or any of the other models too never been one of my problems I learned how to delet them from husband 10.0 along time ago.