Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0

Dear Tech Support:

Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0. I soon noticed
that the new program began unexpected child processing that took up a lot
of space and valuable resources.

In addition, Wife 1.0 installed itself into all other programs and now
monitors all other system activity. Applications such as Poker Night
10.3, Footb all 5.0 , Hunting and Fishing 7.5 , and Sailing 3.6.

I can't seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while attempting to run
my favorite applications. I'm thinking about going back to Girlfriend
7.0 , but the uninstall doesn't work on Wife 1.0 Please help!

Thanks,
Troubled User.....
_____________________________
________

REPLY:

Dear Troubled User:

This is a very common problem that men complain about.

Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 7.0 to Wife 1.0, thinking that it
is just a Utilities and Entertainment program. Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING
SYSTEM and is designed by its Creator to run EVERYTHING!!! It is also
impossible to delete Wife 1.0 and to return to Girlfriend 7.0 . It is
impossible to uninstall, or purge the program files from the system once
installed.

You cannot go back to Girlfriend 7.0 because Wife 1.0 is designed to
not allow this. Look in your Wife 1.0 manual under Warnings-Mayhem/Alimony/Child
Support . I recommend that you keep Wife 1.0 and work on improving the situation.
I suggest installing the background application "Yes, Dear" to alleviate software augmentation.

The best course of action is to enter the command C:\APOLOGIZE! b ecause
ultimately you will have to give the APOLOGIZE command before the system
will return to normal anyway.

Wife 1.0 is a great program, but it tends to be very high maintenance .
Wife 1.0 comes with several support programs, such as Clean and Sweep
3.0 , Cook It 1.5, Do Bills 4.2, and Shop 8.2 .

However, be very careful how you use these programs. Improper use will
cause the system to launch the program Nag Nag 9.5 . Once this happens,
the only way to improve the performance of Wife 1.0 is to purchase
additional software. I recommend Flowers 2.1 and Diamonds 5.0 !

WARNING!!! DO NOT, under any circumstances, install Secretary With
Short Skirt 3.3 . This application is not supported by Wife 1.0 and will
cause irreversible damage to the operating system!

Best of luck,

Tech Support

Scientists speculate that the antioxidants in juice...

HEALTH & FITNESS HEALTH CHECK Robyn Shelton Robyn Shelton
Juicy news could help your brain
Published September 5, 2006


Pour yourself a glass of juice. It might be good for your brain.

A new study has found that people who drank fruit or vegetable juice at least three times a week were far less likely to develop Alzheimer's disease.

Three or more glasses meant a 76 percent decrease in risk -- one or two glasses weekly led to a 16 percent reduction.

"These findings are new and suggest that fruit and vegetable juices may play an important role in delaying the onset of Alzheimer's disease," lead researcher Qi Dai writes in the report, published in The American Journal of Medicine.

But why? Scientists speculate that the antioxidants in juice might prevent the brain from forming the tangled clumps of protein that are found in Alzheimer's patients.

Even so, it's too early to stock the refrigerator with those little juice boxes. Dai, who is from Vanderbilt University, says previous research on antioxidants has not found a benefit against Alzheimer's. He says more research is needed to confirm his group's findings.

The current research, which also involved scientists from the University of South Florida in Tampa, focused on nearly 2,000 Japanese Americans living in Washington state. The participants answered questionnaires about their eating and drinking habits periodically as they were tracked from 1992 through 2001 for signs of dementia.


Robyn Shelton can be reached at 407-420-5487 or rshelton@orlandosentinel.com.

Antioxidant Central

Here are some current links on antixoidnats on the internet:

Go Ask Alice!: Antioxidants

Antioxidant - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia


Antioxidants and Cancer Prevention: Fact Sheet - National Cancer

Antioxidants and Free radicals


Good Food Sources Of Antioxidants


Howstuffworks "How Antioxidants Work"

Understanding Free Radicals and Antioxidants

Antioxidants - Nutritional Information - HERSHEY'S


The Top 10 Antioxidant Foods

The BioPhotonic Scanner

Business Opportunity:




Sales/Business Pros....

Position yourself in front of the NEXT BIG TREND
in the HealthCare Industry, and just business in
general.

In the 70's the first biomarker was Cholesterol, prompting
people to get their personal score, turning it into a $20
Billion dollar business of statin drugs.

In the 80's the next biomarker was Bone Density Scans,
again driving people to get their personal score, and it
became a $200 Million dollar calcium supplement
business.

In the 90's the biomarker was the Blood Sugar/Glucose
measurement, which propelled a $2 Billion dollar business.

The NEW biomarker is the Antioxidant Score!

Our 22-year old publically traded NYSE company owns
the global exclusive rights to a new Antioxidant Testing Technology
developed by the University of Utah called "The Bio-Scanner"....
It's the ONLY device that can non-invasively measure the antioxidant
levels within human tissue and give you your Personal
Antioxidant Score.

Basically, we have a monopoly on the next huge movement
in Wellness & Anti-aging Industry for the next 19 years! Our
goal is to find aggressive Sales and Business, Independent
Rep/Agents who have the leadership qualities and the
relationships to help our company double in sales within 12
+ months. Substantial income can be generated "month
after month" from each machine that is placed into
operation.

This is not for everyone… but for the right person/group,
it's a gold mine.

Target Markets:
We are targeting the 90-Million Baby Boomers in North
America...through healthcare professionals (Doctors,
Dentist, Chiropractors), day spas, health & fitness
centers, gyms, and anywhere people gather to look good,
feel good and live longer. This Antioxidant Testing Technology is already on its way to
\ndominating the Wellness Industry, which economist predict
will grow to $1 Trillion dollars by the end of this decade.
"The BioScanner" in 2005, won the American Business Award
for the "Most Innovative New Product" in the United States. \n
This is "disruptive technology" that will change the way the
world looks at health.

This Antioxidant Testing Technology is already on its way to
dominating the Wellness Industry, which economist predict
will grow to $1 Trillion dollars by the end of this decade.
"The BioScanner" in 2005, won the American Business Award
for the "Most Innovative New Product" in the United States.
This is "disruptive technology" that will change the way the
world looks at health.

Take a quick visit to: HealthScanInfo.com


Web Resources:

1) Article in LA Times on the Antioxidant Scanner

My Current Ebay Auction

This is my current EBAY auction:

CLICK HERE

Can You Read This?

fi yuo cna raed tihs, yuo hvae a sgtrane mnid too
Cna yuo raed tihs? Olny 55% plepoe can.

i cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno't mtaetr in waht oerdr the ltteres in a wrod are, the olny iproamtnt tihng is taht the frsit and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it whotuit a pboerlm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Azanmig huh? yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt! if you can raed tihs forwrad it.

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Apple Boosts Primetime

Well, it's happening as predicted, podcasting has now become video casting and now as per the bean counters, this is actually having an impact on mainstream TV.

Apparently, according to this news article downloads on Apple's Itunes site has had a positive impact on ratings for shows available for download.

We are definitely on the forefront of the convergence of digital media.

Intel Drops the Pentium Brand

Say it isn't so! (Fake sniff here), I actually like the name Pentium, and it is one of those nonsense words that actually alludes to a certain meaning of being at the top. After spending a gazillion of dollars promoting such a name why would a company drop such a branded name?

What are those Blue Guys gonna do now?

The possibility to take 25 dollars and hit it big...

Normally, I don't go for these types of ads...but this one struck me as a little different.

This story begins with a chap known as Alex Tew who resides in the United Kingdom (see how I used the word "chap" quite appropriately, my creative writing teacher in college would be proud).

Anway, Mr. Tew needed money to pay for college, so he came up with a crazy idea, to split a web page into a million pieces and sell those pieces for a dollar ( I guess he thought if he used his native currency of Pounds that would not have as much appeal). He called his page the "Million Dollar Home Page" and started selling adspace. Sales were very slow for a while, but slowly here and there, people started buying these little tiles for a hundred bucks a piece. Once he had a few customers, he wrote up a press release, and let it out into the wild. The rest is history. After only a few months of web presence, after news stories, and tv interviews, the page actually sold out. In fact he sold the last 1000 pixels for appx $38,000 on Ebay. The interesting thing is that the page has become a bonafide advertisement aggregator and actually drives traffic to those that bought those little boxes.

I guess it was only a matter of time before someone figured out a way to do a similar site and then monetize it by way of viral/affiliate marketing. Essentially, much like Amazon.com pays webmasters commisions to place links to products for sale on their site, the folks at this site,
are paying people commisions on adspace that is sold through refferal.

This particular project, combines a lot of high tech ideas and marketing strategies and rolls it all up in to one. Enough to get me thinking that I want to tbe a part of it now before this thing snowballs into something incredibly huge...After all it's only 25 bucks, (not like the $100 that Mr. Tew was charging), what does one really have to loose? The tiny pixel that I bought has already sent considerable traffic to my long distance site.

Read and hear more about it, here.

Today was a special day.

Friday the 13th and it feels very lucky indeed. I got to spend the afternoon taking my son to a series of events. The first one was his Karate class. My son is currently a blue belt, at eight years old, he was one of the youngest in this particular class, however since he enjoys karate and actually practices on his own, he was the most senior student being a blue belt and also have his yellow, green, and blue forms. He was to test for his red form. I normally do not stay for his testing since I don't want to make him nervous by my presence, but seeing this little tiger at the head of the class displaying what I can only describe as "humble expertise" got me captivated and I ended up staying.

The magic moment of the evening came when I looked at him and gave him a reassuring smile, he without missing a beat, looked back at me and returned an even more reassuring wink. Boy, was I happy to be there.

A few hours later, I am now at his school being subjected to booming sounds and beats, waiting in the hallway while he attends a school dance. We at first entered the gymnasium together where the dance was held. I then thought that perhaps he may want a bit of space , so I retreated to where I'm currently positioned in the hallway. The music hasn't gotten any quieter, but, I am simply happy to be here.

The next stop will be Cub scouts, tonight is pinewood derby night We spent a few moments earlier tonight decorating it with murals and stickers. I cut it on a miter saw and painted it with some left over paint that I had in the house. It actually came out pretty good. I missed his last two races, as I am an Army officer who found myself soldiering for a year in the Mideast last year. Simple events of a night with my son. I'm just happy to be here.

Sometimes it's not about the money.

This story is a favorite of mine. I'm actually using it in another one of my blogs, but thought I should place it here as well:

The American businessman was at the pier of a small South Pacific Island village when an island fisherman docked his small outrigger canoe. The fisherman had a dorado and several large grouper in the canoe. The American complimented the Islander on the quality of his fish and asked how long it took to catch them. The Islander replied, "Only a little while." The American then asked why didn't he stay out longer and catch more fish? The Islander said he had enough to support his family's immediate needs. The American then asked, "But what do you do with the rest of your time?" The fisherman said, "I sleep late, fish a little, play with my children, take a late afternoon nap with my wife, Helia, stroll into the village each evening where I sip rum and play guitar with my friends, I have a full and busy life."

The American scoffed, "I am a Harvard MBA and could help you. You should spend more time fishing and with the proceeds, buy a bigger boat with the proceeds from the bigger boat you could buy several boats, eventually you would have a fleet of fishing boats. Instead of selling your catch to a middleman you would sell directly to the processor, eventually opening your own cannery. You would control the product, processing and distribution.You would need to leave this small fishing village and move to Australia, then LA and eventually NYC where you will run your expanding enterprise."

The South Seas fisherman asked, "But, how long will this all take?" To which the American replied, "15-20 years."
"But what then?"
The American laughed and said, "That's the best part.When the time is right you would announce an IPO and sell your company stock to the public and become very rich, you would make millions."
"Millions, really? Then what?"

The American said, "Then you would retire. Move to a small fishing village where you would sleep late, fish a little, play with your kids, take a late afternoon nap with your wife, stroll to the village in the evenings where you could sip rum and play your guitar with your friends."

Amazon Advantage

Amazon Advantage Program

Sponge Bob DVDs

Sponge Bob DVD

Clone Wars - Star Wars

Star Wars Clone Wars Vol 1










Star Wars Clone Wars Vol 2

Microsoft WMF Patch Release

Microsoft has come out with a Windows Metafile (WMF) patch release on an "off cycle release". More info available here.

MP3 Sunglasses

Has the world gone crazy? Or do I just not understand how The Patent Office (USPTO) actually works....

Apparently there is this guy who is now suing Motorola and Oakly over his supposed patent over MP3 SunGlasses ...in almost a humorous turn of events, he claims he had a patent, then lost it, because he didn't pay the maintenance fees associated with keeping the patent, petitioned the USPTO to accept back fees, they denied him, but he claims he still sent in a check which was cashed...


All this over musical sunglasses? Go figure....

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Broccoli and Mushroom Scallops

Made this recipe tonight, it was delectable!

Broccoli and Mushroom Scallops Ingredients: 1 lb medium Scallops 1 1/2 cups sliced Mushrooms 2 Tbsp Margarine or Butter 2 cups cut Broccoli 2 oz sliced Pimientos 1 can condensed Chicken Broth 3 Tbsp Cornstarch 2 tsp Soy Sauce cooked Rice or Pasta

Directions: Cut the scallops into halves. In a 3 quart saucepan, cook and stir mushrooms in margarine over medium heat until tender for about 5 minutes. Stir in scallops, broccoli, and pimientos. Cook, stirring frequently, until scallops are white for 3 to 4 minutes. Gradually stir chicken broth into cornstarch until smooth. Stir broth mixture and soy sauce into scallop mixture. Heat to boiling, stirring constantly. Reduce heat, simmer and stir 1 minute. Serve over rice. 2 servings.